Friday, November 6, 2009

Who does Mornings?!

I don’t do mornings!

Never have probably never will. I worked graves for close to three and a half years and loved that time of my life. My hubby still does and for him it’s nothing to switch from graves to day shift and back. Unfair if you ask me. But working graves and having a family don’t mix.

Kid’s who knew they could throw off your day so much. Why can’t we program them? “Hey where’s the manual for these things? They need to be reprogrammed! Who ever said they could be morning people… UGH NOT me!!" Where's that receipt....

They are so their Daddy’s girls. QueenB definitely she is up at the butt crack of dawn, so I guess maybe that makes her Papa’s girl (he’s a farmer up early you know). Toughie on the other hand switches back and forth, some days she is up bright and early like 6 am ( I think its QueenB’s fault) other days she is in bed with me till at least 7 on school days and as late as we CAN on non school days. All depends on how long Daddy and QueenB want to let us sleep in. So what if your up leave us alone! Can I return the hubby too?

Whoever said the early bird gets the worm, well they can have it why do I need fish bait? But then it also goes, “The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. ~Author Unknown” I must be the second mouse.

Then “Good things come to those who wait” Yes that’s me!!! I’ve finally figured it out. I’m just waiting for the good things. That’s my excuse now.

“Hey DOCTOR!! My caffeine drip is empty!” Oh wait I’m the only one here. My favorite caffeine transport vessel of Mt. Dew is out of stock, “someone go to the store.” Oh wait that’s my job. OOOPS

Well it is cold out now, I guess I could switch. Lower the standards and pull out the Maxwell House. Has to be MH, the hubby will not drink anything else. Why, who knows but I think our home alone keeps Dew and MH in business. “Hey dog, can you reach the sink?” she sits here staring at me like I’m growing another head. Oh and yes I do talk to my dogs, it’s when they talk back I know I’m in for a long day. “OK OK I get it! Guess I better do it, or this day will never get going.”

So after my IV and the functioning has commenced I do accomplish quite a bit. Surprisingly for how much of the day goes by in my staggering sleep deprived stupor. How I get everything around in the morning has to be by shear will and routine. Course a lot has to do with the preparation the night before only because what else can I do late at night than prepare for the next day.

Which brings me on to there is nothing to do at night, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. You see about 11p or 12a is when you think to yourself this being a night owl kind of sucks. Especially in my neck of the woods where everything closes up around 7 pm. Well no more like 10 or 11 but still feels like 7. Plus heaven forbid you turn on that TV after the news at 11 what do you have to look forward to, talk shows, weird things no one should be watching, and you can’t forget utterly the best thing in the whole entire world INFOMERCIALS! (sense the sarcasm??)

Yes the ones where you watch and think, “who would buy that!?” or “It does what?” as your twisting your head upside down “and how?” Then for some strange not from this planet reason all of a sudden your “I have to have one of them!!” Only for it to get to your house and join the shelf, the cupboard, the store room, of all the things you only use once a year or have only used once period.

I started this post as a rant against mornings. How I’m addicted to caffeine. Then funny how it ended as how the whole day culminates in to a twilight zone experience only because

I don’t do Mornings!

“Darn it the IV is empty again, Time for a refill!!”

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