Fly On The Wall.

So here is the set up, the 411, the down-low.

I’ve been picking on Sis lately. She and I talk almost everyday, if not several times a day. The hubby thinks its crazy. My opinion is that my family is a lot closer in some aspects than his. Anyway as you know Sis has three boys. Booger is 5, Duck is almost 3, and Moose is little over a year old.

Aren’t they just handsome boys??

Now our conversations at times are rather amusing and I will tell you why. I’ve been teasing her that I was going to start writing about some of the “phrases” I hear when we talk. She tells me I won’t, when she knows I most definitely will. I told her the other day someone should be a fly on the wall and write this stuff down so we could make millions!!

So here we go, set down that drink, no drinking I don’t want you to choke and it be all my fault.

Phone rings I see on the caller ID its her (second time today) the earlier call however was from Moose playing with the cell.

For your ease of reading I will color code the convo’s. *wink wink* I will be in lovely Red and Sis will be in Blue.

So I answer, “Hello.”

Stern voice says, “Don’t say that to me again or you will go to your room!”

“Ok then, noted.”

Laughing. “No not you, UGH these kids are making me lose my hair today.”

“Nothing new.”

So we chat about a few things, and then mid sentence she raises her voice, “I told you to go find a toy to play with! Quit playing with the tape measure before you slice your brothers head off!”

Not even two minutes later, “I said a toy!! Where are you getting these tools? Of all things your dad had to teach you it had to be the “fixin!” Give me the wrench and hammer. Now get!” pause “Get back here! Give me the screwdriver out of your back pocket too! Is there anymore I can’t see?”

Yeah my nephews are all about the tools. They love the farm and “fixin” things. Really is very adorable. How ever a lot of the boys “fixin” has cost Sis and her hubby some money.

For example the other day Duck decided to cook some long noodles (Ramen) on the grill. Sis thought he was pretending stirring things in the bowl on the grill. There was no flame so all safe right? Wrong they went to use the grill a day later. No gas in the tank. First they are perplexed how this 2 year old was able to turn the top plus Duck had managed to break some part that her hubby had to run, buy, and then “fix.”

Second Sis proceeds to tell me now that Moose is walking, he likes to help mommy. Sis found out the hard way that crayons and dishwasher’s don’t blend well. Enough said.

Another day we are chatting along and she is telling a story about a friend of ours she saw the other day. Again mid sentence no change in tone she says, “You asked for it you eat it! Your brother is not a pig to just dump leftovers on his tray!”

At first I’m like WTF kind of story, huh, what?? Then I hear Duck say, “But Mama he’s (Moose) asked me for some.”

“Ok one your brother doesn’t talk. Two what have you been told about lying, three ugh… uhh… AHH just go away I can’t think with you telling me (Moose) is talking. That thought scares me to no end.”

Then on that note she goes right back into the story like nothing happened. I however am still perplexed with the fact that Duck could come up with such a story and the thought of Moose talking we will all be in trouble.
So I don’t hear a thing she says.

There have been several more. They happen at least once a week. I am absolutely writing them down from now on. That is of course once I wipe my eyes from the tears of laughing so hard. Knowing my Sis and my nephews that I love to death, this will probably be a reoccurring entry.

What?!? 1018!! Your kidding me!!

Yup that’s right I found my old camera. The one I know that the girls ran off with but of course denied.

I know this for sure now because guess where I found it… Did you guess?

In their room, buried in the closet. Underneath all the “toys dat dey don’t wants no mores.” Yeah words from them after I convinced them we needed had to purge some of the blanket of crap toys they don’t play with let alone touch that was covering their floor. I’m proud to say they were happy to give up two whole garbage bags full of toys to get to pick an extra item each from our “wonder closet” or “closet o’ wonder” as we call it.

These girls are so spoiled rotten so of course when holidays and birthdays come around what we can snag and hide in there or things that at the time are to old for them we do. It may sound like we are mean however when we have four family Christmas parties and the expansive family we have for birthday’s they don’t seem to miss one, two, or a few more presents disappearing. I’m sure they will eventually notice but for now it works and makes days like this where it’s time to rid of the old and I can bribe convince them that they do this they get a new toy, it works wonders (hence the name.) Plus it’s a saver in so many ways. First I don’t have to go buy something new, or I don’t have to have them whining they have nothing to do. The best part of it though, if it’s been a rough day a visit to the toy aisle in our house generally makes that day have a brand new tune. I do buy some things if it’s a great deal that you just would be a fool not to get to put in there too. For example I found paint by number sets on clearance for a buck one time when a store was closing when the girls were barely two. These definitely came in handy the other day when of course since we live in the rainforest now.

Anyway onto the point (catching myself spewing crap once again.) So I pick up the camera and both girls have that deer in the headlight look.

“Not me!!” I hear in surround sound.

The battery door is busted off and no batteries to be found which wasn’t a surprise. However what was is that the card was still in it!!! So I get my other camera and hook it up to the puter and to my amazement 1018 PICTURES!! I’m like holy crap!! I know I couldn’t have taken that many… or could I have. I do tend to click, click, and click some more. But come on I know I didn’t take that many. So as we speak it’s loading…

and loading…

and loading…

crap this might take all night…

It’s been an hour and only 300+ is loaded. Will my computer take them all?

Hmmmm well what I’ve seen in the beginning is pictures from almost 4 years ago!! Yeah the first ever time we had the girls with us!! My family and Gary’s threw him a “Toddler Shower.” Best part was it was a total surprise for him. I managed to convince the girls mom to let us have them for a few hours. That his family was planning this to get him what we needed to have the girls in our home. It was early winter and we held it at what we call the Sportsman’s Club here in our little town. It’s a common building people can rent to use and has a range out back. Anyway the play was that my sis called me telling me that there was an indoor yard sale there to come check out, tons of girls stuff. So of course he bit hook, line, and sinker. We get there and we are heading in when he starts recognizing cars. Darn it but up till then he totally believed. SO instantly its “what on earth is going on!!” I just kept walking and in we went to a mountain of presents. Someone even bought us two toddler beds. He wasn’t the only one overwhelmed.

So now that the card has finished loading it gets to the end and… Only 323 pictures survived all the rest had errors, oh wait check that some had errors. With so many pictures the batteries died around 400 something.
This really will take all night. OK new batteries in and round two begins.

Oh well who knows what the error ones were but finding these pictures were a blessing anyway. I’ll have to share them with you soon.

Here is one for now… They were watching the doggies in the snow. Back when QueenB had Hair and Toughie didn’t. My oh my has that changed now. Toughie has a mound on her head and QueenB has just enough.

So with that I’m not staying up any longer I’ll have to show and tell you later what all I found.

A Bit About Mama

So the attempt to write an “about me” section has proved to be quite difficult. Why it’s so easy to write about others rather than yourself perplexes me.

So here it is the debut of the best I can figure of how to explain me.

I’ve lived in the same general 40 mile radius my whole life. Born and raised a small town girl and wouldn’t have it any other way. I grew up on a farm. With that fact I am proud to say I am no stranger, nor do I fear hard work or getting dirty. I will gladly stand up and take on any man that feels they are stronger than I, or any woman, for that exact reason. I wouldn’t say I am a feminist, however I would say I have a feminist attitude especially when it comes to the alpha male with the caveman theory they are still the strongest sex.

I did really well in school, and can’t say I fit into one clique. I was friends with EVERYONE. I called it my eclectic ability to socialize. I still find it present in my life now. I don’t like enemies, however if someone feels they are mine, there in for nothing but kindness from me from now on.

I'm a wife of a Fire/EMS addict. Who has recently dragged me into that lifestyle. Becoming an EMT has been an eye opening experience. It has always amazed me his dedication to this line of volunteerism. (<< can’t believe that’s actually a word.) I can’t call it work only because that isn’t possible to be a paid job in this little area we live in.

My hubby came as a package. When I married him I got twin stepdaughters as well. They are my LIFE. I’ve been blessed by my hubby to be able to be a stay at home mom for them. QueenB and Toughie sure do keep me on my toes, and have a huge thirst for adventure. We are blessed that they are so smart, so active, and so full of love.

We are struggling with the fact that I may not be able to get pregnant. We dearly want a child of our own. Of course nothing will take away the love we have for the girls. Facing this hard fact has been difficult and heart breaking. We will get through it and in fact being in this situation we fully believe is to only make us stronger.

I say that I speak my mind whether you like it or not. I've always been told I posses more knowledge and wisdom than anyone my age should. My Grandmother whom I miss terribly repeatedly told me in my teen years that some day I would realize that having a mind that processed things far beyond my years isn’t a curse, rather a blessing and I should cherish it. I still haven’t figured out how it’s a blessing, but knowing my Grandmother I’m sure I’ll find out soon.

I've chosen to share my thoughts, random theories, some dislikes, and favorites of what ever comes to my mind here for you all to enjoy, disapprove, or perplex you into wondering what on earth is she thinking. I invite you to sit back and take a trip with me into my life, my mind, and the utter chaos and adventure I’m sure will arise.

 

 

True Confessions of a Wanna be green thumb.

So here it is my true confessional of the month week day time being.

I wish I had my grandmother’s green thumb. Instead no, I got the thumb of death, or dust, or well absolutely no gardening talent at all. If I was put in charge to grow a garden for us all to survive, then I’m extremely sorry folks but we are SCREWED!

Now just because I don’t have my thumb yet, (I’m staying hopeful) doesn’t mean I don’t try.

Last year I tried, and I think my setup was rather splendid in the front. What was suppose to grow back is and I’m very excited about that. I’ve taken a picture here for you to see what it looks like at this very moment and I hope as spring and summer progress I can show you what more I have accomplished. Plus the important part of what's actually growing back.

Off to the left is where I will have a gorgeous bird feeder that my Hubby’s grandpa made, that has stepping stones back to it. There are also various other garden statues/items that were put away for winter. My next goal out here is to fill in the empty areas which really only is one, and figure out what to put down to keep the grass out. (any tips would be greatly appreciated) For the most part up front here I have a theme which I’ve been old that a neighbor has named Fire and Ice. Most, if not all, my flowers are red, orange, yellow, and the bush there you can see has red leaves. It’s also a pretty picky bush, but maybe that will be a deterrent to someone trying to get in the garden later on. Now the ice comes from the glass blocks I used, which were free from a friend, and you absolutely can’t beat that.

Next was the mission of something in our back/side yard. I started it but rather lost inspiration halfway through.

We had originally tilled up a diagonal section in this corner, had placed an arbor that I’m hoping to plant climbing roses up this year. I love roses, and really hope they can bare with me and survive.

 

Our biggest problem is this little thing in the bottom right corner. A bunch of the stuff I planted back here she went and dug up. So far all I see coming back is what I believe are the Iris’s.

 

I originally had went and dug/picked all these rocks out of the rock piles at my parents farm to run along the diagonal edge to mark off the flower bed. However like I said I lost inspiration on the whole project and really all they seem to line right now is the front fence.

Whether the lack of inspiration or energy was the culprit I don’t plan on that being the issue this year. We are going to make a fence with a gate to section off a doggy part of the yard, and a people part of the yard. After that is all set, I hope that my green thumb will magically appear this year, and I’ll get to share it all later.

Off to work in the yard now can’t pass up this 70 degree day. Especially in Northern Michigan where last Thursday we woke up to snow on the ground.

Mommy’s Theory Thursday.

So my whole intentions of this blog was to give you some insight in to how this twisted, messed up, most the time sarcastic mind of mine works. You may like what I write, you may not. All in all these are some of the messed up theories that often bounce around in my head. I’ve divided them out by category you could call it. So you will get a few every Thursday. So here it goes.

 

Today’s category is : Theories in a child’s mind.

 

Hand’s off only means wait till no one is looking.

Siblings are meant to be lookouts, partners in crime, sidekicks, and if all else fails the scapegoat.

Never admit guilt, always blame someone else. (refer to above)

If you don’t like dinner accidently spill your plate on the floor.

Crayons, Markers, Pens, and other writing utensils were made for writing on walls, floors, and everything else besides paper.

Every toy I own will fit under my bed.

Clothes must never make it into the hamper, however must be close enough to say I did it.

All books will have less pages when I’m done reading than when I got it.

Bed time is when we play the quietest.

 

Hope you enjoy. More to come next week.

 

First attempt at Post-it Note Tuesday!

So here is my first attempt, fingers crossed.

Play along with us courtesy of SUPAH MOMMY

Here goes nothing!!!

That was fun!! Can’t wait till next Tuesday now!!